MAKCIK NORMAH

pengalaman peribadi Kak Juli semasa menunaikan umrah May 2007



Setelah penat melakukan umrah dan sementara menunggu azan Asr, aku dan ibuku mengambil keputusan untuk berehat sebentar di tingkat atas Masjidil Haram .Tiba2 kami didatangi oleh seorang wanita bernama Makcik Normah,lalu kami berkenalan dan berbual2.

Beginilah kisah makcik Normah seperti yang diceritakan kepada kami…..

Dilahirkan berbangsa India dan beragama Hindu, Makcik Normah berkahwin di usia 16 tahun dan dikurniakan 5 orang anak. Beliau tinggal bersama suami di sebuah kampung terpencil di Perak yang majoritinya adalah masyarakat Melayu. Suami makcik Normah seorang yang pemabuk dan tidak bertanggungjawab , oleh itu makcik Normah terpaksa bekerja mengambil upah mencuci pakaian di beberapa rumah taukeh Cina dikampung tersebut untuk menyara kehidupan beliau dan anak2. Semasa berusia 24 tahun , makcik Normah yang sudah tidak tahan lagi dengan perangai buruk suaminya, bertekad untuk bercerai.


Kehidupan makcik Normah sebagai ibu tunggal bersama 5 orang anak yang masih kecil dan ditemani oleh ibu beliau yang sudah tua adalah bahagia walaupun miskin dan serba kekurangan. Jiran2 banyak membantu beliau menjalani kehidupan harian. Empat orang anak lelaki beliau bersekolah Melayu dan didedahkan kepada pelajaran Agama Islam semenjak kecil lagi. Anak lelaki sulung makcik Normah merupakan seorang yang bijak dan cepat menimba ilmu terutama tentang Islam. Beliau bijak mengaji dan menghafal ayat2 lazim walaupun bukan seorang Islam. Pada ketika itu makcik Normah tidak begitu berminat dengan Agama Islam dan beliau juga bukan lah penganut Hindu yang taat.

Anak perempuan bongsu makcik Normah mengalami kecacatan semenjak dilahirkan lagi. Sehingga berumur 5 tahun anak kecil itu masih belum boleh berjalan dan bercakap. Risau dengan keadaan anak beliau, makcik Normah membawa anaknya berjumpa dengan seorang sami Hindu di kuil. Nasihat sami tersebut amat mengejutkan makcik Normah! Sami menyarankan supaya anak itu diserahkan kepada keluarga angkat Melayu untuk dibesarkan sebagai seorang Islam. Maka anak itu yang kemudiannya dinamakan Aishah diserahkan kepada sebuah keluarga angkat Melayu dikampung itu juga. Hubungan makcik Normah dengan Aishah masih akrab walaupun tidak tinggal sebumbung. Aishah dipelihara dengan baik dan makcik Normah dapat melihat perkembangan yang positif pada diri Aishah.

Suatu hari ditakdirkan ibu makcik Normah jatuh sakit dan sudah tidak dapat bangun untuk menguruskan diri. Dalam keadaan yang sudah tenat rupa2nya ibu tua itu menanam cita2 untuk memeluk agama Islam sebelum ajalnya tiba. Dengan berat hati, Makcik Normah terpaksa taat dengan permintaan ibunya supaya beliau menghadiri kelas di Perkim bagi pihak ibunya supaya cita2 beliau untuk memeluk Islam tercapai. Setelah seminggu mengucap dua kalimah syahadah , ibu tua itupun menghembuskan nafasnya yang terakhir. Keajaiban dialami oleh makcik Normah dan orang2 dikampung tersebut apabila mayat ibu tua tersebut berbau harum sepanjang pengurusan jenazah beliau. Bau harum itu lebih dirasai apabila sanak saudara mengucup dahi arwah! Sanak saudara ibunya yang beragama Hindu juga begitu hairan dengan kejadian tersebut. Begitulah kebesaran Allah SWT yang pertama kali dirasai oleh makcik Normah. Disaat itu terdetik dihati kecil beliau untuk lebih mendekati Islam…

Setelah ketiadaan ibunya, makcik Normah bertekad untuk menyambung pengajian di Perkim dan mendalami pengetahuan tentang Islam. Beliau juga mendapat bimbingan daripada seorang ustaz dan isteri . Akhirnya terbukalah hati makcik Normah untuk memeluk Islam. Setelah mendapat hidayah, makcik Normah rajin menghadiri kuliah2 dan kelas2 pengajian yang diadakan di surau dan masjid di kampungnya. Berkat kesungguhannya kini makcik Normah telah pandai mengaji Al-Quran . Azam beliau selepas ini adalah untuk menjejakkan kaki ke Mekah dan mengalami sendiri kebesaran Allah SWT….Doa tidak putus2 dipanjatkan agar cita2nya untuk ke Mekah tercapai…

30 tahun berlalu dan anak2 makcik Normah semuanya sudah besar dan bekerja. Aishah yang semasa kecilnya tidak boleh berjalan dan bercakap kini sudah bekerja di sebuah kilang memproses daging itik. Walaupun keadaan fizikalnya tidak sempurna, namun Aishah mampu untuk berdikari dan mempunyai pendapatan sendiri. Kuasa Allah juga telah mempertemukan jodoh beliau dengan rakan sekerja. Kini Aishah telah berkahwin dan tinggal dirumah sendiri. Tiada yang lebih menggembirakan makcik Normah apabila melihat anak bongsu beliau berjaya mengharungi kehidupan yang perit semasa kecil dan kini hidup bahagia bersama seorang suami yang dapat menjaga beliau.

Anak2 lelaki makcik Normah juga semuanya sudah berkeluarga . Cucunya yang sulung sudah besar dan menjalani latihan di TUDM Kuantan untuk menjadi seorang juruterbang. Makcik Normah sangat rapat dengan cucu beliau ini yang dipelihara semenjak kecil. Cucu ini yang telah lama mengetahui tentang cita2 neneknya untuk ke Mekah, bertekad untuk menabung bagi membiayai perjalanan neneknya ke Mekah.

Walaubagaimanapun, setelah sekian lama mengharungi kepayahan hidup dan kemudiannya memperolehi sedikit sinar bahagia, sekali lagi makcik Normah diuji. Anak sulung makcik Normah yang semasa kecilnya begitu bijak didalam pengajian Islam , kini berdepan dengan dilemma akidah apabila mengambil keputusan untuk menukar kepada agama Hindu kerana ingin berkahwin dengan seorang gadis India setelah kematian isteri pertamanya. Begitulah dugaan yang Allah berikan kepada umat manusia selagi hidup di dunia ini. ...


Hancur hati makcik Normah apabila mendengar keputusan anaknya itu, namun makcik Normah tetap sabar dan redha dengan dugaan ini. Beliau tetap melayan anak nya dengan baik walaupun sudah berlainan agama.

Pernah suatu hari anaknya mengajak makcik Normah mengikuti rombongan ke Kuala Lumpur dan salah satu tempat lawatan ialah ke kuil Hindu di Batu Caves. Berbekalkan surah Al –Kaafiruun , tersemat dihati makcik Normah kandungan tafsiran surah tersebut iaitu:

“ Katakanlah (wahai Muhammad): Hai orang-orang kafir * Aku tidak akan sembah apa yang kamu sembah* Dan kamu tidak mahu menyembah (Allah) yang aku sembah* Dan aku tidak akan beribadat secara kamu beribadat* Bagi kamu agama kamu, dan bagiku agama ku….”.
al -Kaafiruun 1-6

Begitu teguhnya iman seorang muallaf bernama makcik Normah! Makcik Normah juga tidak putus2 berdoa supaya Allah memberikan petunjuk dan hidayah kepada anaknya supaya kembali ke jalan Allah…

.Hijrah Makcik Normah

Pada usia 63 tahun ,berkat simpanan Makcik Normah maka separuh tambang perjalanan ke Mekah telah berjaya beliau kumpul. Cucu kesayangan beliau berjanji akan menampung perbelanjaan yang selebihnya. . Maka tercapailah cita2 makcik Normah untuk ke Mekah menunaikan umrah …

Apabila mendengar berita ibunya akan ke Mekah, anak sulung makcik Normah yang sudah murtad itu tiba2 mengalami satu perasaan yang berbeza. Beliau bergegas ke lapangan terbang sebelum sempat makcik Normah berlepas dan menyerahkan wang tambang kepada makcik Normah! Beliau merasa bertanggungjawab untuk membiayai perjalanan ibunya ke Mekah walaupun sudah berlainan agama. Jelas beliau seorang anak yang baik dan makcik Normah begitu terharu dengan pengorbanan anaknya. Dari riak wajah anakya makcik Normah dapat merasakan satu perubahan akan berlaku kepada anaknya. Semasa kunjungan ke Mekah makcik Normah tidak putus2 berdoa semoga Allah memberikan sinar Islam semula di hati anak sulung kesayangannya.

Walaupun diselang seli dengan jenaka yang diselitkan makcik Normah semasa beliau bercerita ,airmataku tetap mencurah2 semasa mendengar kisah hidup beliau selama sejam berbual. Semasa solat Asr kami berjemaah dalam satu saf. Itulah kali terakhir aku bersalaman dengan tangan kasar makcik Normah…tangan yang telah melalui pelbagai liku kehidupan bagaikan sebuah cerekarama di tv.


Selepas itu aku tidak lagi berjumpa dengan makcik Normah sehinggalah pada hari terakhir semasa mengerjakan tawaf Wida'.Ketika itu, secara tiba2 sepantas kilat kulihat makcik Normah melintas di hadapanku menuju ke Hijr ismail....Walaupun tidak dapat bercakap dengan beliau, aku merasa puashati dapat melihat kelibat Makcik Normah buat kali terakhir...



Sekembali ke Malaysia kisah hidup beliau sentiasa bermain difikiranku …Terdetik juga dihatiku samada Makcik Normah ini benar2 wujud atau satu pengalaman istimewa yg Allah ingin berikan kepadaku....Walau apapun, aku pasti Allah inginkan aku mengingati kisah makcik Normah ini sampai bila2 …mungkin juga elok kalau di kongsi kisah hidup beliau dengan semua. Satu kisah pengajaran tentang erti kesabaran dan keteguhan iman dalam mencari sinar kebahagiaan di dunia yang sementara ini.

Semoga kehidupan makcik Normah sentiasa terus dirahmati Allah SWT….dan semoga anak sulung beliau akan kembali kepangkuan Islam...ameen.

Wallahualam.

A KAMPONG GIRL'S OATH

OATH NO 1

I PLEDGE, to the best of my ability and judgement, to include a variety of , or at least one type of ULAM ,accompanied by either SAMBAL BELACAN, BUDU OR CENCALOK , and not excluding fried ikan masin on the side, into every rice meal that my family and i consume for the rest of or lives.

OATH NO 2

I VOW to plant, nurture and maintain, a sufficient number of trees ,that shall provide an endless supply of CILI PADI , or maybe for extra credit , plant some KACANG PANJANG, BENDI and TOMATOES, for my whole family’s daily intake in order to prevent them from swallowing any more of the lethal doses of chemical base pesticides.

OATH NO 3

I shall encourage, if not persuade , family and friends to consume the commonly served and easily available ulams, such as his majesty ULAM RAJA, lady PEGAGA , dynamite DAUN GAJUS, miss aromatic PETAI and the crunchy le JERING ......or at least the cool and collected CUCUMBER , in order to help them maintain a well balanced, hassle free, simply chew, "kambing" diet provided by nature that is going to ensure their health and well being for years to come, insyaAllah.

OATH NO 4

I SHALL introduce to all my family and friends the nutritious values of “DESIGNER ULAMS” such as “JARUM TUJUH BILAH” and “SAMBUNG NYAWA” to give them more options to the above ulam choices

OATH NO 5

WHILE I CONTINUE to keep this Oath unviolated may it be granted to me to enjoy life and the practice of the art and science of nature’s medicinal values through ULAM consumption, with the blessing of Allah and respected by my family and friends.

OATH NO 6

WHATEVER IN CONNECTION with my professional practice of ULAM consumption or not in connection with it I may see or hear in the lives of my family and friends which ought be spoken abroad, I will divulge, reckoning that all such information should NOT be kept secret.

DESIGNER ULAM 1

Pokok Jarum Tujuh Bilah merupakan tumbuhan dari keluarga kaktus tetapi berdaun. Ia dianggap genus keluarga kaktus paling primitif. Ia berasal dari Korea tapi boleh didapati dengan mudah di Malaysia, Thailand dan Indonesia.

Juga dikenali sebagai BINTANG TUJUH, POKOK KANSER, CHAT SIM CHAN,PRESKIA


Terkenal dengan namanya Jarum Tujuh Bilah kerana terdapat tujuh batang duri yang meruncing tajam di sepanjang batangnya. Daunnya yang rangup boleh dibuat ulam dan salad.

Kegunaan

1. Merawat kanser terutama kanser kolon/usus besar, kanser hidung dan kanser yang lain.

3 cara:

1. Masukkan 2 helai daun ke dalam air panas, dijadikan teh dan diminum

2. Daunnya dimakan sebagai ulam 1-3 helai setiap hari.

3. Amalan perubatan ini amat popular di kalangan masyarakat Cina. Pengambilan sebarang jenis teh dilarang kerana dapat menghapuskan khasiat daun di dalam badan.


Selain merawat kanser ia juga boleh merawat darah tinggi, kencing manis, pening kepala dan sakit buah pinggang. Kisar daun menjadi lumat, dijadikan jus dan diminum

DESIGNER ULAM 2

SAMBUNG NYAWA Nama Saintifik : Gynura sarmentosa DC, Calacia procumbens Lour. Nama Lain : Dawn Dewa, Leaves of the Gods, Googoolipid, Mallucan spinach, Sambung Nyawa, Daun Dewa, Am Akar, Akar sebiak, dan Kelemai merah, bai bing coa, ngokilo (Jawa), beluntas cina (Melayu), she juan jao @ fujung jao (Cina) Famili : Asteraceae

Pengenalan

Sambung Nyawa adalah jenis tumbuhan tahunan yang banyak digunakan dalam perubatan di negara-negara asia tenggara seperti Malaysia, Indonesia dan Thailand. Namun sebenarnya ia adalah tumbuhan asli Mynmar dan Cina. Ia boleh hidup dalam lingkungan ketinggian 1 hingga 500 meter dari paras laut. Ia mudah membiak melalui keratan batang dan mudah tumbuh di kawasan yang agak redup, intensiti cahaya pada kadar 40 – 50 %, suhu udara berkisar antara 20 – 30 C dan mempunyai kelembapan yang sederhana, dengan taburan hujan tahunan antara 1500 – 2500mm. Tumbuh dengan batang menegak, atau kadang-kadang bagian pangkalnya rebah di atas tanah dan keluar akar, berbatang basah, bercabang, berwarna keunguan. Boleh mencapai ketinggian 6 meter dan berbau harum. Daun tunggal, agak tebal, mudah dipatahkan, bertangkai serta berseling. Helaian daun berbentuk bulat telur sampai memanjang, ujung dan pangkal runcing, tepi berjerigi, pertulangan menyrip, berwarna hijau muda. Bunganya berwarna jingga kuning, berkelamin ganda namun ia didapati amat jarang berbunga.

Penanaman dan Pembiakan

Selain faktor-faktor persekitaran pokok sabung nyawa ini perlukan tanah yang subur, gembur dan mampu menahan air. Sebaiknya pada kadar keasaman pH sekitar 5.5 – 7. Ia membiak melalui keratin batang. Perlukan agak banyak air, tetapi tidak terlalu bash dan bertakung.

Kandungan Kimia dan Kesan Farmakologi

Kandungan kimia daun sambung nyawa antara lain, flavonoid (7, 3, 4 trihidroksi-flavon), glikosida kuersetin, fenoleat asid (terdiri dari kafeat asid, penta kumarat, penta-hidroksi benzoate dan vanilat asid) triterpenoid, alkaloid, saponin dan tannin.

Tumbuhan ini bersifat dingin dan neutral. Khasiatnya antara lain ialah antineoplastik, menurunkan panas badan, mengobati sakit limpa, sakit ginjal, sakit kulit, menurunkan tekanan darah, menurunkan gula darah, antimicrobial, antikarsinogenik, sitotoksik terhadap sel kanser, hipertensi, stroke, penyakit jantung, kolesterol tinggi, diabetes, gangguan lambung, radang pita suara, radang tengkuk, batuk dan sinusitis.

Kegunaan Dan Khasiat

Daun Sambung Nyawa dapat mengurangkan kadar kolestrol dan menurunkan tekanan darah tinggi. Di Malaysia ia juga digunakan untuk merawat sembelit, kencing manis dan kanser. Ia juga digunakan untuk merawat masalah buah pinggang. Biasanya ia dimakan mentah sebagai ulam. Batang tanaman Sambung nyawa sering digunakan untuk meredakan demam.

Ia juga, digunakan dalam penyembuhan penyakit ginjal, disentri, infeksi kerongkong. Di samping itu, ia boleh digunakan untuk menghentikan perdarahan, mengatasi ketidakseimbangan datang haid melancarkan fungsi ginjal, dan gigitan binatang berbisa. Umbinya untuk menghilangkan darah beku (haematom), pembengkakkan, serta patah tulang.

25 RANDOM THINGS ABOUT ME

1. Birth name Juliana Suryani binti Abdul Rahim . ……

aka “ kak Juli” to most people……

”kakak” to my siblings…..

“Juliana” , “Nana” or “kakak koko” to my childhood frens in Kedah…

”Along” to my nieces n nephews….

“Sepi” to my sister’s Indon maid (???)

”Juliana Suryani anak suria cucu tok ani” (tu dia!!) to my childhood neighbour

“Ju” to most people in Kemaman…..

”ibu” to my 3 kids….

2. Eldest in a family of 7 kids…..Born in Alor Setar GH & raised in Jitra, Kedah . Lived in 290,Jalan Masjid with parents (both cikgus), grandparents(grandpa retired police), siblings and 2 cousins…..all 13 of us lived comfortably in a 5 bedroom one bathroom half batu half papan double storey house…how nice…I can only dream of having this extended family life now…….

3. Since babyhood I sleep with my grandma @ tok until she passed on….

4. Grandparents always been the anchor of the family, parents out working, tok cooked all meals from breakfast to dinner (back then in the 70’s goreng pisang pun kena buat sendiri) , cousins (much older than me) helped with house cleaning and babysitting…grandpa raised chickens (I didn’t eat chicken back then, they were pets ,not food!) and managed a sawah padi (quite a distance from where we lived) and maintained his small backyard orchard of petai, rambutan, durian and manggis trees…also landscaping around the house….roses, orchids, bunga cina, jasmine, kenanga…….I owe every skill I know to my grandparents……they are my true idols!!

5. Around 5 to 7 yrs old I used to follow grandpa to the mosque on his bicycle for Maghrib and Isya’ mass…I didn’t pray , only listened to the prayers while patiently waiting for him at the mosque corridor….Can’t forget the scent of his minyak attar and how he skillfully lilit his serban...he3…at times I wished I were a boy so I can dress like him and join the atuks praying…( confirm ada identity crisis masa ni…heee)

6. Always amazed by my grandpa’s neat wardrobe…despite all the attires that he always receive from his frens and family,he kept only two sets of baju Melayu, two batik shirts and pants and two jubbahs which he wore during the two hari raya celebrations….(he usually distributed his clothes to his bendang workers )..now i understand the true meaning of "less is more..."

7. At the end of each rice harvest season, my grandparents always bring me and my 2 other adiks traveling…..got my first airplane ride experience in 1980 to Kota Bharu….We also get to go Singapore, Penang, KL….night train rides were fun too…visiting relatives or simply makan angin….syiok!

8. Lately always thinking about my glorious childhood activities back in Kedah where every evening I used to play ‘tuju kasut” , “police entry” , “datuk harimau”, “lompat tinggi” , “batu tujuh” with frens …boys and girls….Sabarina , Biyah, kak Not, Gee, Shah,Nae, K Nayah, K Ida, K Ina …..we were all soooo ecstatically happy then….

9. Still a vivid childhood memory, “stealing” tok’s food strainer (penapeh) and smuggling to mengaji Quran class sebab after class nak ikut the boys and my partner in crime, Babuni, to go tangkap anak udang kat tali air bendang (maybe only Kedahans are familiar with this, whenever they pumped out the water from the sawah back to the irrigation system to let the padi masak, it’s a fiesta for kids to catch anything that came out with the water rush!)

10. When I was small always had recurring nightmares of being chased by a buffalo (kerbau) in a bendang setting... Nowadays don’t remember having any dreams at all…

11. During weekends I woke up 5am to go jogging / walking while picking water lily and lotus flowers along the sawah padi with my grandpa , adiks and best friend /neighbour , kak Not ……..still remember the magnificent picturesque view of sunrise and inhaling realllly fresh morning air at the sawah ……

(Kak Not is arwah Norlaili Osman…she passed away of cancer 11 yrs ago at age 30)

12. Despite all my fond memories related to sawah padi, I still haven’t had the experience of actually planting a rice tree…he3….takut lintah …!! I only stepped into the sawah when it’s dry / harvest season).This could be added to my to do list in the future…hope its not too late!

13. I am tone deaf and failed miserably in the singing department, but still remember playing ‘impersonation of artists” with my sis and our superstar Kak Nayah (Liyana Ishak , now with Bank Negara) my highly talented neighbor who used to impersonate Sharifah Aini and Uji Rashid in singing or acting…she’s the best! Sometimes we became “Boney M’ or ABBA….those days…..heeeee

14. I took a few weeks of organ lessons in primary school , I guess challenged by my sister’s high flying talent in music. …and my cousin , Kak Siti had to send me on her bicycle of course….but parents finally accepted the fact that I’m melodically handicapped…can’t remember a note…...would rather cangkul tanah or conteng dinding….he3..I have the highest respect to people who are musically gifted…singing or playing any musical instruments…tabik springggg!

15. Another memorable childhood activity back then was playing “masak2 “ where my grandpa’s pudding trees were victimized by us to prepare our colorful ‘dishes”……still remember the scent of the sliced leaves….and the sting from the cut on my finger….ouch! The same 5 cent blade was also used to carve my “art work” on the house dinding and lantai papan….and a few unfortunate tree trunks…..the beginning of my artistic career…he3

16. During standard 6 I belonged to a group of kamceng buddies ….Ani, Ta, Nita , Eny , Khodat, Dek Yah and Mas (did I miss anyone??)….we were classmates and school dance team…..who sometimes played Sherlock Homes @ private investigator……we usually lepak at school after tuition class and talk about girl things , “period”, puberty, jerawat…all naive and innocent….somehow we were not boy crazy at all, unlike some 12yr olds nowadays….

17. One evening while we were playing “sepak bulu ayam” (biasa budak lelaki je main ni…) I accidentally stepped on the nail …! Couldn’t remember who pulled the nail out of my tapak kaki but we all went to the clinic together…. Bicycle convoy!

18. Mas is my bestest fren and thanx to her we never lost touch since we were 6 yrs old until today….! I never thank you enough , Mas….you’re the best!

19. The last day of primary school…. I was the last one to receive my offer letter to boarding school….TKC….an all girls school(???) I was numb for about an hour …then cried miserably to separate from my kamceng buddies….never thought I would have to be so far away from my family and frens …uhuk….the end of my childhood days in Kedah…felt like the end of the world….I wasn’t at all ready for this ……!!

20. First day in TKC was the scariest day of my life !The seniors seemed all gigantic and boisterous!! I felt homesick the minute I stepped into the school ground….constantly thinking of changing school back to Kedah, somehow persevered the first year…and later glad that I stayed on until the end…Those 5 years were the best times of my life!! Also had another group of kamceng buddies whom i miss a lot..you know who you are gurls:-)

21. The next phase of my life were KPP and US days….lots of memories , met lots of wonderful people (am glad that we’re now reconnected thru facebook)…..and not so wonderful people too..he he….therefore don’t feel like elaborating much further.

22. I graduated from OU in Spring 1993, landed my first job as trainee architect in Langkawi, then KL,yada yada yada ....then in 1997 married a “Ganu Kite” chap and moved to Kemaman Terengganu for a new beginning .

23. Dream of having many children and re-live my childhood life with an extended family like I had before..…however, God has other plans for me….

24. Granted with 3 wonderful kids and one understanding husband , living a simple kampong life in a small 3 bedroom house we call HOME...and reaching the age 40....phew... I have nothing to complaint about.....

25. By the way, my late grandparents never get to see me even finish secondary school ,or graduate, or get married or have my babies …..They both passed on in 1985 .Arwah tok passed on at home one evening after 4 yrs of cancer and my grandpa passed on the morning after in KLGH… of stroke. Such a rare incidence that we had two burial ceremonies 2 days in a row…….May Allah bless their beautiful souls….ameen.

DON'T RAISE BOYS....

I do watch Nickelodeon you know ,and during an interview with the JONAS BROTHERS and their PARENTS, they were asked ….

“So how do you keep your boys grounded….with the fame and attention and all…?”

THE PARENTS answered…

“We give them lotsa love and always remind them of their purpose …we are not raising BOYS here, we are raising MEN who needs to be responsible adults and good members of the society….!”

(hmmmmmm!! light bulb moment for me…)

Having two sons of my own, I can’t help but worry how they might turn out once they are all grown up since they now belong to the club whose some of the members had been exercising violence against the female gender… (On the note of the International Women’s Day celebrated worldwide this month)

Firstly, should we let “boy” be the term used only for the gender column of our newborn son on the hospital name bracelet….?

When a boy grows up ,don’t be fooled by his physics ( tall, dark, handsome, strong) , because on the inside he might still be that little boy who is insecure, deprived of love and attention, angry etc

In my opinion “BOYS” are the ones who abuse wives, rape sisters and make mothers lives a living hell because they NEVER GROW UP! They remained to be “boys” for the rest of their lives …….

Mr & Mrs Jonas’s method of raising their children could be something to ponder…

Therefore, parents out there, don’t raise ‘boys”, raise “men” who APPRECIATES wives, CARE for their sisters and make mothers lives heavenly.

I’m sure all of us strive to provide the best education, comfort and all the ‘material’ requirements that our sons need…. however, if you haven’t done these in a long time (or maybe never ..yet) please consider....i'm sure it's not too late...

ESPECIALLY for sons below 13 years of age…

Hug and kiss your son (esp before he goes to sleep) and let him know that you are thankful to Allah for loaning him to you …

Tell him how much you love him and give salam (assalamualaikum…good nite) before you leave his room

When he’s asleep recite in his ears…Ya Latiff…Ya Aziz…Ya Wadud…(Maha lembut….maha perkasa….maha penyayang) as many times u like

Always remind them that you depend on him to care for his sister for the rest of her life…for him to make sure that his sister mix with the right kinda friends , that everytime she goes out of the house covering her aurat , and that she will always have a brother to share all her problems with (ni penting ni!!)

If your son shows interest in cooking or baking or cleaning , encourage him to help in the kitchen…never ever throw your son out of the kitchen and say that cooking or cleaning is a women’s job……NEVER!!

Hopefully, insyaAllah he will grow up to be a man who is SECURE, RESPONSIBLE AND HAPPY CITIZEN , a man who truly understands his purpose on earth.

Remember, an abusive man is not always uneducated or from a broken home….there are highly educated men who rape and men with high status who abuse …..renung2kanlah...

COOKING WITH LOVE

Despite hours spent watching cooking shows, I still cook the same meals everytime ,coz I NEVER write down any of the recipes. My favorite nowadays would be Rachel Ray, since she’s loud and clumsy, unlike Martha Stewart, who watching her show usually stress me out..

I consider myself highly efficient in preparing a meal in less than 30 minutes but still needs hubby’s help in cleaning up the kitchen …(he also cooks and amazingly enjoys washing dishes and scrubbing the sink…unbelievable! so I take advantage la..)

Fascinated by sister (she is a true domestic goddess!!) who feeds her children home made burgers , home made bread and pizzas, roti canai, mayonnaise(the list goes on and on..)I attempted to start baking bread but until now(it’s been months) the ingredients bought are left untouched..he3 (I have chest pains already thinking about the energy I need to uli the dough…)

Preparing meals from scratch to feed our family is the best way of living… More barakah, u can doa all you want & choose the healthiest ingredients you can find…. I salute you supermoms and superdads out there whose ‘air tangan ‘ will insyaAllah help build better society:-D

HUTANG

After a long break (5 months I think) I resumed my Quran class last week. This time Jasmine came along , since she's already 3 months old & I'm confident enough to handle her alone in the car.Interesting that I had to read Ayat 282 surah Al Baqarah....the longest ayat in the Quran (bukan baca satu nafas yer..) that talks about HUTANG....the importance of writing down the loan agreement...the requirement of 2 male saksi (or one male 2 female)...etc...makes me wonder whether we're doing it the right way with our bank loans ...
It's actually not just for bank loans, even hutang mertua kat menantu ke...kawan2 ke ...still kena tulis so that x timbul masalah di kemudian hari especially bila berlaku kematian.....did i owe anyone any money that i might have forgotten ??tu la, tak tulis....kalau ada yg berhutang dgn akak tu and x sempat nak bayar , don't worry...i halalkan:-)

Al Baqarah 282

you who believe, when you contract, when you are dealing with, a debt, such as in prepayment for (future) delivery of goods or a loan, one upon another for a stated, a known, term, write it down, as confirmation and security against any dispute; and let a writer write it, the contract of debt, down between you justly, accurately, not increasing or decreasing the amount or the terms; and let not any writer refuse to write it down, if he is requested for such a task, as God has taught him (the kāf of ka-mā, ‘as’, is semantically connected to the verb ya’ba, ‘refuse’), that is, just as He has given him the advantage of knowing how to write, he should not be niggardly in this respect; so let him write (repeated for emphasis), and let the debtor dictate, to the one writing the contract, for he is the one being witnessed, and must be fully aware of his obligations; and let him fear God his Lord, when dictating, and not diminish anything of it, of the debt due. And if the debtor be a fool, a squanderer, or weak, not up to dictating on account of old age or immaturity, or unable to dictate himself, on account of being dumb, or not knowing the language and so forth, then let his guardian, the one in charge of his affairs, be it a parent, an executor, a custodian or an interpreter, dictate justly. And summon to bear witness, the debt, two witnesses, men, mature Muslim free men; or if the two, witnesses, be not men, then one man and two women, to bear witness, such witnesses as you approve of, on account of their piety and probity; the number of women is because of the fact, so that if one of the two women errs, forgets the testimony, given their lesser astuteness and accuracy; the other, the one remembering, will remind her (read fa-tudhakkira or fa-tudhkira), the one that has forgotten — the ‘reminding’ clause is the reason [for the choice of two women], that is to say, so that she may be reminded if she errs or strays into error, because this [forgetfulness] is the cause of it (a variant reading [for an, ‘that’] has the conditional in, ‘if’, with [the verb inflected as] tudhakkiru, ‘she will remind’, making it a new sentence, the response to which [follows]); and let the witnesses not refuse, whenever (the mā of idhā mā, ‘whenever’, is extra) they are summoned, to bear witness and take responsibility for the testimony; and be not disdainful, lazy, to write it down, that which you have witnessed in truth (for this frequently occurred), be it, small or great, a little or much, with its term, that is, the date on which it is due (ilā ajlihi is a circumstantial qualifier referring to the [pronominal suffix] hā’ of taktubū-hu, ‘you write it down’); that, writing down, is more equitable, more just, in God’s sight, more upright for testimony, that is to say, [that is] more helpful in summoning witness, because it contains the reminder; and nearer, closer to attaining [the desired state] that you will not be in doubt, with regard to the amount and the due dates; unless it be, [that] there is, trade carried out there and then (tijāratun hādiratun: a variant reading has tijāratan hādiratan, in which case the nominal sentence is missing its subject, and must be the pronoun for tijāra, ‘trade’, that is, hiya, ‘it [fem.